bunking school

i am a bad mommy... i let my kids bunk school today! i felt guilty for about 10 minutes and then thought ag what the hell... it's not like they're working very hard these two in between days anyway... and they did go yesterday :)

i had breakfast with Angel this morning , which was lovely as always, we chatted away till almost midday... and she paid... bless your heart my friend!!

next stop: shops... highly frustrating cause i was looking for summer clothes and the shops only have winter stuff in stock... summer is not really going anywhere... it's still really hot during the day...

then~ big news... i bought kay an electric shaver... yes my little boy is ready to shave off his fluff, he's in that in between stage where the fluff is starting to turn into something more serious but not really a moustache yet... shame... so i thought he'd better get rid of it cause even the kids at school are starting to tease him... so he's now the new owner of a wet and dry electric shaver... and batman will do the honours this weekend cause i'm sorry that's something i have no clue how to do... do you just shave the lip or the chin too?? see... no clue!

I'll be taking the rest of the week off so i'll see you guys next week... have a good time ;)

it's like monday

only it's Tuesday i know... we had a public holiday yesterday, freedom day, working days today and tomorrow and then another two public holidays... the rest of humankind in SA has these two working days off, all except me that is... yes... it's a conspiracy...

oh well it could have been worse, some also work tomorrow... but not me! anyway i have absolutely nothing to tell you so i'll be stalking and trying my best to work a little, but i promise nothing... toodles till tomorrow ;)

suck mangoes

SOLD OUT!!! SOLD OUT!!!

i want to go to cape town december, bugger the budget holiday i had planned... but... but it seems i'm forced to go back to the budget escape idea again... cause i can't find any flights to cape town in december... cause they're all sold out already!!.... the cheap flights that is....thanks mango... 8 freakin months before the time.... and i thought i was pushing it by wanting to book my tickets early... pffffffftt....


oh hell... there goes the idea of sipping gallons of red wine on a vineyard in Paarl... cause that's what i was invited to do.... suck mango... i guess i should try SAA, BA and such but they are bound to be way more pricey....


so i'm swapping this...


for this...



yes... isn't that enough to cry a bucket full???

unanswered questions

many people would probably think i'm hung up on the past, because it's been two years and still sometimes stuff surface that i post about, my divorce, my feelings about it, and for you that find this irritating, i accept that, but i have to deal with these emotions as they happen, they're less frequent these days but i need to talk about them cause i so want to rid myself of it as soon as i possibly can, that truth is very much a part of me, for me that is the case anyway, so i write these thoughts down, because this space i created for that purpose, to get rid of the junk that still spills over me sometimes, i have to deal with these things as they come up, so that's why i write what i do... i have to be true to myself... here goes...

it is said when people divorce that there are always two sides, for some surely that is true, and for me? i still look for the reasons, my fault in all of that... that was my marriage...

was i jealous?

did i expect too much of him?

did i want too much?

what did i do wrong?

what did i do to make him do the things that he did, say the things that he did... i've made some sort of peace with myself, i've negotiated with myself and came up with some sort of truce that i could live with...

cause i had to have some part of the demise didn't i?

i couldn't have done everything right, why should i be justified?

... so i hold myself accountable for things that i'm unable to name, that i've given up trying to name, for as objective and honest as i can be~ the only crime i committed was to love too much...

that i followed my heart instead of my head... to have made too many wrong decisions...

that~ is what i did wrong... something that i will never allow myself to do again... and something that i still struggle to forgive myself for... cause it broke a lot of hearts, broke my spirit for a while, shook everything that was held dear to my sons, for that i am guilty, for that part i have no excuse... i was part of it...

i look at pictures of myself and my sons after my divorce and blissfully that strain, that clinging decay was left behind, thankfully... but the scars remain, the guilt remain, the shame... what price did i have to pay, what price did my sons have to pay to get to this point?

inspiration

have a good weekend ya'll :)

this picture hopefully inspires you to NOT sit on your ass the whole weekend... get out there and live a little!

~~~~~

"A runner's creed:

I will win;

if I cannot win,

I shall be second;

if I cannot be second,

I shall be third;

if I cannot place at all,

I shall do my best."

~Ken Doherty

strange...

it struck me that most of my male readers have something in common... check this out... coincidence?... definitely strange... in no particular order...

Sage (my pimp)

Ozzy (my inspiration)

Matt (my blued eyed boy)

Greg (my worst nightmare)

Glug (the legend)

Will (my toyboy)

Nick (my priest)

Kyk... ok him and Obi are the odd ones here...but i still had to mention them yo!

do you see that? all FOUR LETTER names! how weird is that?! i entertain easily don't you think... ha... well to all of you four letter guys... what was your mama's thinking boys?

do you saffa's realize that we have a long weekend coming? i'm only working one day next week... oh yeah oh yeah and it's not even my birthday! other random news tit bits...

• both my boys are now little rugby players... happened overnight and they're loving it!


• batman took mercy on me and is paying me a extra R1000 child support this month cause i've shopped so much... bless his little heart...


• my favourite apprentice won this week, i know SA is like out of the stone ages we're probably 2 years behind... but i don't mind, i just looooooooooove the trump and his pouty lips


• amazing race starting soon! yes... another stone age season but who the hell cares!


• my quarterly PMS is setting in... i know~ run for your lives!


• my boss came back from a adventurous holiday in Botswana, where they were attacked by an elephant bull... hehe my boss apparently screamed like a crazed woman and disappeared into the bush to hide... wmahahahahahahha...

desktop meme

Angel tagged me to do a desktop meme... showing you how my desktop looks like... and there it is... looking at a sexy guy's ass all day is just perfect don't u think!? hehe... i've had the wallpaper for quite some time and i just don't tire of it... i just love the runner's world mag and this wallpaper i got courtesy of them....

i'm supposed to tag some unsuspecting readers... but i won't... if you like this do it, and let me know of course! ... if you don't well just leave it then... huffing and puffing...

stalker that is moi

i'm a stalker... friendly and not threatening...see i even wear a tiara on occasion... but still i stalk...

guilty as charged...

especially if the insomnia kicks in, as it does on a regular basis... and the bananas doesn't help...

i stalk you...

are you scared? don't be...forgive me... you really shouldn't be... during the day when i'm not into my work~ i jump through as many blogs as i can... and then again until you've posted... and then later again to check on your comments.... so sue me... and then the pièce de résistance .... my internet connection at home is the speed of a snail on weed... very very slow... with a mind of it's own... so if you see sweets on your stats hanging around for a long time... don't fret... i'm stuck there and my connection doesn't want to go forward or backward... or it takes a lifetime to download all the millions of pictures you have on your sidebar... so i linger and read some more... ok??... just wanted to clear that up, i read you guys a lot... but i have no inclination to... hack into your brain and suck your tongue... ok maybe some but that's a whole different story... although i'm known now as sweets i still have a sweetass addiction to cute intelligent men... and a very non lesbo inclination to all you gals... hehe... dang i was doing a very convincing job until now... anyway i'll be visiting your blog soon.... evil chuckle...

hasta la vista baby!

hairy stories

oh my greatness... i don't know what's gotten into me... who's idea was this for me to grow my hair again??? .... me???? shit... horrible decision.... i thought i was over the whole margaret thatcher look by now but obviously not... i shall be wearing beanies as often as possible this winter and hopefully by summertime i'll look half decent again...

this is the look i'm going for...

not the face... if only right?

and this is the look i'm sporting at the moment...

don't i just look delicious??

dna malfunction?

i'm surrounded by intellectuals on a daily basis at work, and then my family are vrot with intellectual genius... and i'm part of this madness... and yet i'm not part of that at all... cause face it, i'm many things, but intellectual... hmmm... not so much.... intellectuals scare me just a little bit... their brain patterns zones information on other ways... we get to the same answer but i take another route... and then nobody really understands what i say, cause i seem to interpret and communicate differently... or not at all... for some reason that song of gnarls barkley CrAzY! epitomise what i feel... well that's the story of my life... i think they make me feel stupid, and they don't even know they do... i'm the only kid of 5 that never got a degree, not to mention the honours and master degrees and the mba's... the list goes on... then i'm the only one out of all of us that got divorced, not once but twice, i smoke, i swear, i drink... i don't always wear underwear... hehe come on laugh a bit i'm even depressing myself!!... maybe i was swapped at birth... or the capacity for brainpower was exhausted when i was conceived...shit... i'm like the black sheep... the odd one out... i sometimes wonder why i'm like this and they're all like that... not that i'm unhappy being me... or not fit into my family... i'm just wired differently.... and sometimes i wish i could be more mainstream, boring but somehow it looks a better option... cause i go through life and it feels asif nobody knows who i really am, or gets me... or could care less... onwards i go... don't pity me, i hate that... i'm just saying... that's how it is...

~~~~~~~~

i'm not opening this one up for comments, if you really want to say something email me ;)

sweetass.rsa@gmail.com

friday naughty haiku

chocolate fingers
finding my wanting body
exploring my haste

have a good weekend ya'll !!!!!

open wide

my dentist is such a sweety... he is so scared he'll hurt me... which he does on a regular basis...

yesterday was my second visit to his chair in two weeks, and i've got another appointment next week... just forking fantastic... all of a sudden the muti he's injecting me with is not working... when my eyes start going as big as saucers... he does the "hands up" cops and robbers routine and gently asks...

am i hurting you?

hell yes doc... just slightly you know... please wipe off my tears running down my cheeks why don't you?

ok sweets let's call it a day, come back next week and then we'll try again!

he injected me twice yesterday... the cheek was numb but my teeth felt every single poke and drill... and... the cheek took up a life of it's own... i was making fAnny fart noises when i tried to talk... imagine me asking the receptionist for another appointment...

receptionist: yes ms sweets how can i help you?

me: i fnnweed afother aphhhointment please... fffffffirty minutes

receptionist: another appointment??

me: yefff the infechtions aren't wwforking... shwo doc shways i schewould chshould chwome bwhack aghain...

**receptionist frowning incredulously trying to figure out what the hell i just said... while trying to dodge the spittle i'm involuntarily projecting her way**

receptionist: ah don't worry sweets, just call me tomorrow ok...*giggling*

me: har har vwhery fffffunny...

snowy

that's what you get when you tell a 8 year old to give his new hamster a name... besides the fact that my son has never seen snow in his life... well... the little rodent isn't exactly white... anyway...poor snowy was added to our little family about two weeks ago...

huge excitement is an understatement...

it all started with him visiting a friend... the friend's neighbour has four hamsters... and one empty cage... so highly excited jay comes running at lightning speed to deliver the message from the hamster broker that the said cage is up for sale... oh yes... for a whopping R150 for a second hand cage... not likely my son i patted him on the head... go offer her R49.99... thinking the enterprising neighbour would laugh at his offer...but instead she knows a good deal when she sees one... dang... ok cage bought... then the various additions, tunnel, food, a house, yes a house!... setting me back another R170... and R45 for snowy...

well snowy settled nicely into things... he is taken out every day, a million times, and given exercise... i came up with the brilliant idea to build him a maze to run around in with the 101 unused vhs tapes we have... brilliant idea mother dearest... just a pity we forgot about billy the cat... yes...

billy got the hamster...

for about 2.5 seconds... when we realised what was potting... jay screamed like a girl... a really loud girl...billy FORTUNATELY was scared to death and dropped snowy... then snowy disappeared under the tv cabinet... i just wanted to laugh... cause it was really funny... but my two sons were just short of spastic hysteria... so i took control and waited for snowy to appear... which he did... a little wet but fine... poor billy is now up for sale... good grief~ the drama!

batman crazy

firstly, I have decided that calling the ex just that is just boring beyond belief, so i've decided to name him Batman... why?... well he is evil enough sometimes to have bats follow him everywhere... and if he pushes out his chest just a teeny little bit, and put his hands on his hips... he just needs a cape... mwhahahahahaha...

i've done a psychiatric evaluation on Batman and this is what i've come up with, cause really, there is something wrong with that man, as normal as he appears to be most of the time... sometimes he's just not...

i wrote a post last year sometime... and keeping the content of that in the back of my mind... together with our society being bombarded with so much information about psychiatric problems~ and of course Oprah, she just loves this subject... i have slowly, without wanting to realise it or accept it or face it for that matter realised that my ex is probably bipolar...


when we got divorced the last time we went to see a psychiatrist to discuss how to handle the divorce with the kids... she confronted him after a few sessions ... she privately told me that the person she's met and talked to in depth does not gel with the person i was divorcing... there was and is an inconsistency about his behavioural patterns that is staggering... she told him that she suspects that he has some sort of imbalance where he overreacts on certain issues or situations...

cause what's been so unbelievably difficult through this whole journey that i've known this man is that i "know" who he is, i know how good he is... and then yes i know how absolutely evil he can be... two completely different people...

i was brought up in a semi sane household, something like depression for example never featured anywhere, i come from practical stock you see :)

if you have a problem, fix it, don't cry about it...
don't gnash your teeth and cry big crocodile tears...
fix it!

so in my mind i have always had this frustration with Batman that i just couldn't understand why he wouldn't FIX things... if he was depressed, which he often was, fix the reason why you're depressed FFS!... if he got raging mad... i couldn't for the life of me understand how such small things could totally get him off...

all of the symptoms are classic... his symptoms started at the age of 17, 18...

• frequent thoughts of suicide
• grandeur thoughts and unrealistic plans
• rages for no apparent reason
• sexually promiscuous
• frequent depression
• spending sprees
• excessive drug and alcohol abuse
• total denial

i've always seen him as a roller coater, he was and is forever going up and down up and down... now what i've realised is that by divorcing him, yes absolutely did the right thing at the time, and no i have no plans whatsoever of getting back with him... ever...

BUT... i was always the human shield between him and the kids... i removed them from any situation whenever i could see things started going wrong... and now i've conveniently removed myself out of that equation.... fuck...

that psychiatrist who cornered him gave him a number of a psychologist and he just laughed it off... so ... he has ALL of the classic symptoms of bipolar... and i know this... so what do i do with this knowledge??


shocking realisation without any way of doing anything about this... and it's genetic... bloody beautiful!....i can't very well sit him down and tell him i know the secret that will change his life forever, he will either laugh his ass off or get insanely mad... i can handle both but what's the point of telling him if i KNOW he's not going to do anything about it, he likes the way he is i think... which is also a symptom.... just call me guru sweets :)


... anyway as long as my kids are safe and sane i'm probably just going to let it be and if the opportunity ever presents itself... tell him he's totally off his rocker and to go steal some lithium...

fascinating

some words just carry more oemf or meaning than others... and so does photos... here's some of my favourites words and one of my favourite pics...


nemesis

~


revolution

~


grace

~


limerick

~

naive

~


goad

~

wanker

i wonder if these words say anything about me...??

fav picture... stunning eh?

just perfect

it's only barely Monday morning, 5 past midnight... listening to cheesy music on the radio... currently playing Africa by Toto and for the first time in years i actually enjoyed listening to it... bad memories that song... but like some ass i dated sometime ago suggested... make new memories... good Lord I think i have Sunday evening blues on this early Monday morning... hehe... woe and gnashing of teeth... i think the thought of my kids starting school "today" is getting to me... argh... lunch boxes and stinky socks starting all over again in about 6 hours... such delightful things to look forward to... so happy going back to school boys, you better work like there's no tomorrow and make mama proud... pretty please?! otherwise i'll sit you down, tie you to a chair and sing the lyrics of Toto's song to you in my worst possible voice... enough to give you nightmares for weeks... now go get 'em tiger...

I hear the drums echoing tonight

But she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation

Shes coming in 12:30 flight

The moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation

I stopped an old man along the way

Hoping to find some long forgotten words or ancient melodies

He turned to me as if to say, hurry boy, its waiting there for you



Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

I bless the rains down in africa

Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

The wild dogs cry out in the night

As they grow restless longing for some solitary company

I know that I must do whats right

Sure as kilimanjaro rises like olympus above the serengeti

I seek to cure whats deep inside, frightened of this thing that Ive become



hurry boy, shes waiting there for you

Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

I bless the rains down in africa

Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

6 word meme

I’ve been tagged by bangers and mash to do a Six-Word Memoir... there was another blogger who tagged me too... but for the life of me i can't remember who, please forgive me for not mentioning you ;(



Quoted from Smith Magazine: "Six-Word Memoirs: The Legend"

Legend has it that Hemingway was once challenged to write a story in only six words.


His response?

“For sale: baby shoes, never worn.”

Last year, SMITH Magazine re-ignited the recountre by asking our readers for their own six-word memoirs. They sent in short life stories in droves, from the bittersweet


“Cursed with cancer, blessed with friends”
and poignant “I still make coffee for two”
to the inspirational “Business school? Bah! Pop music? Hurrah”
and hilarious “I like big butts, can’t lie”



no fear i won't tag anybody... ok i'll hint who i want to do this meme... jackson and... cath... but hey no pressure ;)

my try...

"EYES PIERCE MY SOUL, I SMILE"

poetry rocks!!

when i was younger i couldn't fathom why anyone would want to read poetry, the fact that people loved poetry or voluntarily would read the stuff was beyond me...

then i grew up and now i'm one of those people...

my personal favourite is Ma by Antjie Krog, I don't know why but it just gets me every time... stunning... i absolutely love poetry... i recently found this blog and just had to share this poem with you...


poem by Ocellus









How is it
When I look at this world
I am not overcome with sadness
I caress
Tiptoes in thunderstorms
Transgression to transgression
The sea boils
I can hear the hiss at night
In those moments when you are not me
A tear swells
But has no where to fall
Gravity, for once, giving way to the melancholy
This moment
Or perhaps that one over there
Offers the opportunity for absolute clarity
What I do
Internalize the chaos outside
In an attempt to find connection with the inhabitants
What I find
The absurdities within me
Are no match for the insanity of humanity
I’m sorry
For having said way too much
Or for having said nothing at all to anyone
The shadows
Of the overlapping spheres of life
Part for the god ray that accuses my presence
And I bow
In the light of my own judgment
.
I realize that darkness resides ever about me


~


if you liked that read this one, another favourite ... poetry rocks... who knew ;)

milf action 2

if you haven't followed the conversation from yesterday or the day before, please go back and check if you are so inclined... the battle of the sexes continues and (hint hint) i could maybe use some help, Greg is walking right over me ;)

I said yesterday: "but have you guys never heard of the word 'tact'?

Greg's reply: "Tact? As soon as we use tact the question becomes about honesty. "Why can't you just be honest with me?" or "Why don't you tell me what you are thinking?"

Yes we have tact. That is why a man doesn't usually point and say, "Hey, Honey, look at her tits." But if you ask, you must deal with the answer.

My theory is that since Walt Disney, most women have come under the Cinderella spell. They think a Prince Charming actually exists, when in reality, we are all flawed human beings. Many women want honesty and tact so long as it maintains the illusion that they are a princess. Many have the illusion that the rest of their life with a person will be just like the first date, the first month, or the first year. It won't. People who don't grow together become bored of each other.

By age 30 or 40 a man will fall into one of several categories:

1) The "Yes, Dear drone." Relationship will be extremely boring. Shallow women will be happy with this man. Others will either dump him or have an affair. He'll become a dreamer.

2) He'll pick honesty over tact. If he's good enough in bed, she'll overlook it. If not, then the relationship won't last long. Women don't want honesty, they only say they do.

3) He'll open up his other options.

I innocently said: "men still feel sex is just sex, and although a lot of woman also think that way, you have to admit that on some level it's more than just sex... so i think men are more open to affairs yes, but it's the woman that calls the shots, being yes or no..."

Greg's reply: A cigar is just a cigar and sex is just sex. It is people that make more of it. And it is religion that has made sex (especially in our time period) something other than it is. The problem here is this culture of guilt people have a hard time avoiding when it comes to sex.

Sex isn't some bad thing you hide away and do. As long as people are responsible, there is absolutely nothing different about sex versus anything else you might share with someone. Religious and cultural hang-ups turn it into something else. (I've got a lot to say on this, but I'll save that for another time).

Men are not "more open" to affairs, nor are women "more open" to affairs. There isn't really much difference between us. We are human and we are drawn to excitement equally. As individuals we find different things exciting, so that is where we differ, but this isn't based on our sex. As far as calling the shots, I disagree, we are equal here too. People often have the illusion of power, but this is only an illusion.

"naughty naughty... you read playgirl? hehe... ok if you buy literature of that nature both sexes are objects, no depth or no character or no substance are given to either... if you are in that magazine you are an object..."

There is the cultural influence coming out. Playgirl is a magazine like many others. It makes just as much sense to feign shock at someone reading "The Economist". There is nothing wrong with sex. And as far as objectification, I've read both. Playgirl is nothing but sex. But with Playboy, it is one of the few magazines that I've maintained a subscription to because it is substantive.

We objectify everything in our lives, so why not sex? This is the nature of how our brains work. We create generalizations that keep us sane. We start with base desire before discovering details. If men and women did not objectify each other they would never get together to fuck, make babies, and find more meaning in life.

The only reason we have the illusion that men objectify women more is because a woman will generally know for certainty if she will get laid on any given day.

With the next one I still believe, no I'm absolutely positive I'm right and you're wrong here... but ANYWAY: )

"if i was one of the three I would have waved the other two goodbye and wished them luck, if a guy can't see what he's got it me... well his loss ;) moving on..."

Ok. You go on believing that. That works fine if you have no interest in the guy. If all three women have some interest in this guy, then it won't matter if they are best friends, sisters, or lovers; the knives will come out as soon as one turns her back. As a guy, I've personally experienced this more than once.

I again ploughed on.... "Woman tend to struggle between the difference of equality in the workplace and equality in relationships."

With Greg bulldozing me once again: I have strong feelings on this one, and will only briefly comment. Women often want anything but equality in the workplace; they more often want preferential treatment. Men cannot treat women the same as they would treat other men or else they will be charged with sexual harassment or discrimination. Men are brutal to each other in the workplace. Our comments are raw, sexually charged, and confrontational. We often treat each other less than human. That is the nature of the workplace. Yes, there are examples of guys taking advantage of women, but in most cases these advantages aren't too different than the treatment men face too.

And with women advancing to positions of power, the sexual advances are starting to balance out between both sexes. As I've said before, sexual harassment only applies to ugly people

and lastly: "you're kidding right? really? wow... if that's the case... well those blue balls have to be mounted and ... ahem... let's leave it at that shall we?"

Among friends, no I'm not kidding. Yes some guy you know from the office or from playing basketball or baseball with, probably not. But your friends, hell yeah.

you guys are so strange, you know that??

milf action

i could blog about the tooth i had pulled yesterday but thought you would find this more entertaining... please note that i am on another planet today due to the painkillers... I read Greg's blog regularly, he has very interesting and amusing thoughts on how to take over the world in general... but honestly... the guy is really intelligent and has good insight and an interesting view on most issues... he is quite genius in some ways but like all men always likes to have to last word...

he left a comment on my MILF post yesterday... a very Greg like comment .... so here goes... it's a really long, I've broken it into segments and answered accordingly....

"woman, they stick together... we don't turn on our own..."You really don't understand your own kind do you? Men get a really bad wrap because we are too often open and honest about our reactions.

Woman: Honey, why are you looking at her?
Man: Because she has really nice tits.

My answer: hmmmm... mostly us girls tend to stick together, men have nothing on us girls on that level, sisters really look out for each other... but like any theory, mine is flawed, we are all human after all... yes you guys are "open and honest" to the point of being ridiculous, and yes I see where you're going with this... but have you guys never heard of the word "tact"?

Granted our brilliance doesn't always shine. We objectify women in the open, all the while women objectify men, often to a higher degree, in secret. Maybe you left something out. Sure women who stare eye to eye don't turn on each other. But watch what happens as soon as one turns her back. Still don't believe me? Then let's have a little test:

1) When a heterosexual couple has an affair, without thinking too long about it, whose fault do you think it is, the man's or woman's? Every man or woman reading this will think man first, even if they write something like, well we need more information.

My answer: no i will admit, it will be the woman's fault. i'm speaking for myself here, not for womankind, not for woman in general, but only for myself. i have been in a few situations where a affair was blatantly on the cards, an affair being a sexual relationship with a married or involved person. i thought every "offer" through, analyzed my motives and in only one case was willing to go ahead and do it... to me having an affair is wrong, sure lust is overpowering beyond belief but i've been on the other side, i know how it feels when your husband dips into the lake of lust... so to me jumping into an affair isn't that simple, men still feel sex is just sex, and although a lot of woman also thinks that way, you have to admit that on some level it's more than just sex... so i think men are more open to affairs yes, but it's the woman that calls the shots, being yes or no, let's go for it or no go fuck yourself you have a wife and kids at home.

2) Read a copy of Playboy magazine and then read a copy of Playgirl magazine. Which spends more time objectifying the opposite sex?

My answer: i have to be honest, never had a copy of either in my hand. and if i google playboy or playgirl i'm sure to pick up a virus of some sort so...

in general: greg... naughty naughty... you read playgirl? hehe... ok if you buy literature of that nature both sexes are objects, no depth or no character or no substance are given to either... if you are in that magazine you are an object... pure and simple.

3) Thought experiment: if a handsome, wealthy man has a casual (no sex) date with three women who happen to be friends, and then the man tells them all: "I know you are all friends, and I like each of you but don't feel right dating all of you. So I'll leave it to you three, since you are friends and know each other well, to figure out which of you should continue to explore a relationship with me." What would happen?

Greg's answer: two women would turn up missing or dead.


My answer: if i was one of the three I would have waved the other two goodbye and wished them luck, if a guy can't see what he's got it me... well his loss ;) moving on...


Greg says: Women are much more competitive and ruthless when it comes to the opposite sex.

My answer: Yes I have to agree on this one, woman have become very ruthless and aggressive, a mistake I think. Woman tend to struggle between the difference of equality in the workplace and equality in relationships. Relationships aren't supposed to be a competition, and to me equality does come to play in certain aspects of a relationship but somehow I think it's not really even supposed to be an issue. Personally I like a man to be a man in the relationship, I know a lot of woman like to be in control, but to me it's a natural process of complimenting your partner, it should be fun and rewarding, not a constant battle to see who's in charge.

Greg says: Men share more of a camaraderie and will often sacrifice his own blue balls so that at least his buddy will get laid.

My answer: you're kidding right? really? wow... if that's the case... well those blue balls have to be mounted and ... ahem... let's leave it at that shall we? I have to explain here that girl friends can be competitive amongst each other... and as we don't have any blue balls issues so we tend to be quite possessive and overly jealous at times, yes... i have to admit.

Greg says: Men who seek sex become stupider. Women who seek sex become smarter. This is why we get all the blame.


My answer: it takes a man to admit that Greg, well done ;) as you said in the beginning... "granted our brilliance doesn't always shine"... too true ;)

MILF

in my mind a MILF looks like this....

but apparently not... Mom I'd Like to Fuck... that's the acronym a lot of woman in their thirties have been labelled with... basically if you're a mommy = you're a MILF... now looking at the whole phrase i guess it's not a total insult but still... MILF~status is certainly not something I totally like the sound of....

... so whoever came up with that acronym should be spanked until he begs for mercy... or shot and left to bleed out of the 20 random holes in his body!

cause it's definitely a man who came up with that name... don't you think??

woman, they stick together... we don't turn on our own... for some reason MILF just makes me cringe every time i hear it...

it conjures up images of a wrinkly old woman bonking her brains out with the neighbours teenage son.... argh.... not a nice picture that!!!!

it's a stage in a woman's life where you could start, take note COULD start feeling slightly inadequate, slightly inferior, cause face it, if you're a mommy, the once firm flesh is maybe not so firm anymore, stretch marks and all sorts of gravitational circus tricks are performed on your once steaming hot bod... and now.... sigh... you're called a MILF...

the meaning aint bad as i've said but still MILF sounds like some sort of fungi or some sort of incurable disease ... really it does!

so bye-bye twenties, the thirties are glorious!!!

and now you would ask: but wouldn't you want your twenties back?... definitely not!... my thirties are quite liberating in so many different ways... if you forget about the stuff i mentioned up top and concentrate on the rest that is .... much better than my twenties... you really come into your own on so many levels but alas there are drawbacks.... like the MILFishness ... but... if you guys only knew... dating or fucking a MILF for that matter would make any man want nothing else ever again... there is certainly something to be said for experience.... and of course reaching one's sexual peak... sorry if i shocked some of you, but hey i'm a MILF and i'm blunt, so there deal with it....

maybe i should just change my perception and get over it...

embrace my MILFness...

enjoy it...

or die trying...

MILF signing off ;)

woza weekend

monday is officially cancelled...

who's idea was that anyway?

haiku escape

Tulula made me do it~wrote this haiku... i was totally dark yesterday... i scare myself when i'm like that, for no apparent reason, boom... dark... luckily it doesn't take much to get me right back... so back to the haiku...

Sweets is innocent...

sweets wouldn't be so sweet anymore if she kept on being down and out... so hell i blame Tulula... that is the name that Ruby gave my other, darker half... hehe... good one Rubes!! no wonder Bridget's got a crush on you.... anyway... it dawned on me that maybe subconsciously i was depressed cause it's my wedding anniversary today, the one that was not meant to be, it would have been 10 years today... wow, maybe that's it... i've been rescued from my darker side by some good news!!

i phoned my SIL and i'm starting my in house AutoCad training today!! whoohooo....

i am so excited it's ridiculous!!!!!

and that's not all!!! i put my planet fitness gym membership up for sale, the remaining 12 months... junk mail i love you... two guys phoned me... and bonus the one guys lives in my area... what's the forking chance!!!!... he wants me... i mean the contract!!! so we'll do the paperwork ASAP... ah... i will have to hold a farewell for my favourite treadmill at the gym but things are looking up... see i think i just needed some action, and i sure got it...ok not exactly the action i was looking for but action non the less...hah... AND it's weekend! ok... on to somber haiku... have a good weekend ya'll ;)

my heart beating fast
understanding out of reach
freedoms ragged edge

unsaid words is all
to keep my head from falling
silent cries shouted

laughing at the edge
dreaming about tomorrow
that may never come

why do I feel this?
why do I ask these questions ?
why do I still care?


revolution rife
grace unknown or not welcome
it's dark in my soul


riding a horse now
laughing at my fears and thoughts
tomorrow i wait

not myself today

“I have a great love and respect for religion...

great love and repect for atheism....

what I hate is agnosticism...

people who do not choose.”

~ Orson Welles

meme done

sheebee tagged me for this meme... and don't worry i won't tag anybody ok... bridget!!!??? you hear that??? ok i lie i would love to see the insides of angel's handbag but i know she also hates meme's so... don't worry i 'll just sneak a peek whenever... or you can give me a guide tour angel! hehe... anyway!!! on to the meme then...

here's my handbag...

and what's inside!

1. black leather wallet, love the wallet although it's a bit of a dud, my cards don't fit, strange...
2. cell phone, nokia
3. pen
4. pee shooter ~ jay's
5. 4 lighters, can never be without a lighter can you?
6. 1 box of marlboro lights cigarettes, never without a pack
7. mentos sweeties, kids love them, i do too ;)
8. lip liner
9. lip gloss
10. small bottle of perfume
11. pepper spray... i've always wanted to use this but have never had the chance.
12. sunblock stick... africa baby!
13. tube of germalene... i don't know!
14. 4 x normal lip balm
15. 1 special lip balm...softlips hehe
16. floss
17. compact mirror
18. id book
19. necklace
20. flash disk
21. hairband thingies, i'm growing my hair... one word - disaster...
22. secret container with secret feminine goodies
23. spur's wet ones... i know my kids are all grown up but they still spill and mess on a regular basis...
24. lots of pilletjies... i get severe headaches so i'm sorted for anything from migraine to sinus

that's it! and yes those are my big toes in the picture.... giving you a thumbs-up ;)

april 1st

it's april fool's day... but unfortunately i have no prank up my sleeve... couldn't think of one thing to do... boring isn't it~!!!!!!????

anyway lemme tell you about a very amusing incident...

the kids told me that daddy has got a new girlfriend... ooh lala.... i said... yes kay said Daddy needs someone to look after him....... mwhahahahah no shit sherlock... anyway... about two weeks ago the ex phones me...

him: hello darling ex wife...

me: yeah yeah what do you want?

him: do you have a copy of our divorce papers handy?

me: our divorce papers? oh yes i do, i actually have it framed... i will cherish it always...

him: har har... seriously do you have a copy?

me: lemme look in my personal file... hmmmm... oh yes here it is filed under "happy days are here again" mwhahahahahah...

him: are you enjoying this?

me: oh my dear ex husband, is it necessary to ask the obvious??

him: so you do have a copy?

me: affirmative corporal

him: (small voice) please fax it through to the following number 011....... attention Paula...

me: (evil chuckle bubbling right out of my belly)... are you for real?

him: (silence)

me: mwhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahahahahaha

him: yes...

me: so this dolla wants to check if you're still married? oh my god... this is just too precious!!!

him: she checked on the home affairs website and according to their records we're still married, did you know this???!!! (highly upset)

me: as a matter of fact, i do... shocking but not to worry, this problem should soon be rectified after i change my surname back to my maiden name...

him: oh...

me: so are you serious? really? does she want proof that you're not married?

him: (and here he gives himself away on so many levels) well yes, when we last had a thing we were still married...

*sigh* isn't he just a peach??!! and poor Paula, new newby, good luck pops, you're going to need it, if you don't see the red lights flashing all around the place, just embrace what's coming your way ok? ok!

i'm so going to love this... the previous girlfriend was Pauli, and this one is Paula... so i'm just going to have to have a slip when I meet her:

him: ex wife... meet my new girlfriend Paula

me: hi Pauli, so nice to meet you!

him and her together: no it's Paula, not Pauli...

mel: so sorry, there's just so many girlfriends and names... maybe you should wear a name tag?

ahhhhh... so much fun to be had....