T~G~I~F!!!!!

the only disability in life is a bad attitude. –

Scott Hamilton...

so don't let me catch you with a bad attitude today, ok....rock on kids, good times !!!!

unsung hero...

her name is gladys...she worked for me for quite a while...back when i was married and had money... she could clean my place like something out of the twilight zone...when she was finished everything looked brand spanking new...but i'm getting side tracked... gladys is the mother of 4 kids and uneducated... but i've never met anyone who has inspired me more... she firstly takes pride in her work... she doesn't care that her job is to clean other people's houses... it's her job and she's proud of it...

she's brought up four very difficult kids, all who has 2.4 illegitimate kids who she also cares for... i always left her food to eat, and every single thing i left her she would take home, to share with her kids and her grand kids, so that nobody goes hungry... she earns minimum wages but still have managed to build herself a house, not a shack, a house with bricks, a proper roof, windows and doors.... gladys become my friend... she is such a cheerful and funny person... an example...

when i had jay i picked up 20 kg with my pregnancy, not a pretty sight right...so when i came out of hospital, bloated, with a huge mummy tummy (lovely picture i'm painting here hehe) with hormones pouring out of every exit they could find... all i wanted to hear was...

that is most beautiful baby in the whole damn world sugar...!!

you did real good...

bless you and let me kiss your feet...

but when gladys saw me the first time...she said, and i quote

“hauw sussie you are really fat now hey?”... after which i promptly burst out in tears...poor gladys felt bad for months after that... but it was the best thing anybody could have said to me... bless her heart... there are so many more gladys's out there in our country, woman who sacrifice their all so that their children can have the future they never had...and gladys my darling, your my hero...you've taught me to be grateful for everything, to smile every day and to do the best you can always...and that is a good lesson to learn don't u think?

new happy face!

don't you think my new face (i know it's called a header) it's just gawwwwgeous.... angel was an angel and helped me, i tend to be totally juiceless with stuff like this! THANKS ANGEL!!!

if you hear a strange exploding noise, that's me...i'm about to explode and just disappear into space...puff....i'm over worked and under paid... what's new pussy cat, i know! another 7 working days until a blissful christmas holiday... i was thinking yesterday, yes it does occur from time to time... Bridget did an interesting post the other day...looking back at the year...and that made me think about my year... the good, the bad and the ugly...

1. i started my year with a bungee jump, that should probably have been some kind of omen me thinks....
2. i started dating again, the bad omen sticking it's ugly head out again... that phase didn't last long... just tell me is there ANY decent guys left out there, besides the gay and the married ones???
3. i struggled with kay at school, thank the dear Lord he's probably going to pass, but still, it was really hectic...
4. my ex started paying maintenance...oh yeah oh yeah...that was spectacular!!
5. i started blogging in july i think and this has totally changed my world... i have to mention all you nanas who's put a solid smile on my dail for every single day since then... angel, glug, lee, will, bridget,sheebee, fish, rabbit, philip, louisa, god wiggly,kyk,mosmozi,curious girl, divine miss m!!!...(hope i didn't miss anyone!)... and then the lurkers out there, i have no fucking clue who you are but i know you're there... thanks everyone for reading my blog, really, i never thought anyone would actually read my blog, so this has been quite an interesting and rewarding journey for me...
6. i've made new friends, which is always great... friendships can never be forced it just happens and spank my sweet ass i've made some extra ordinary blog buddies and some actual real life friends as well!
7. i started running again this year.... running is a passion of mine... i don't run fast or very far but the bits that i have time for makes me dream of better things and i truly think that that me~time makes me a better mom and a overall better person.... i just wish i had more time to run! after all i've got my rockin watch and my running babies begging every day but time is so limited it sucks.
8. i took my beasties on holiday twice this year, in april we flew down to george for a week, and to see the excitement on their faces made it so worth while... i love my kidlets so much it's a bit insane, but they are everything to me, really don't know what i would have done without them!

that's about it... overall it hasn't been the most exciting year of my life, but it's been satisfying in a weird way, i've moved on and for the first time in the longest time i look forward to tomorrow, to next year... the only thing i've missed this year is getting laid, really this cycle has to stop, maybe i should ask santa for a shag-voucher for christmas...teehee...who knows what can happen right!

christmas came early!

i got my watch!!!!! at long forking last.... ain't it just the prettiest thing you've ever seen!!!

i officially now have a crush on this gorgeous piece of watch, my running shoes have moved down to second place....sorry guys

another present we got this weekend, a bike! my boys are over the moon, kay has got the gear changing down but unfortunately poor jay's feet doesn't even reach to the ground.... huge disappointment.... ill have to make some sort of plan to get him going... first i must get enough money together to guy them helmets... it's a really strong little bike, 125cc... it is cc right??? .... anyway you know what i mean... not really into bike lingo... but am really looking forward to play with this little fellow...!!!

i know my garage looks horrible, one of the things i'll have to do december...

my new neighbours...

i have new neighbours...apparently they're lesbians...don't have anything against gay couples ok...i totally enjoy gay men, they are the most entertaining interesting people i've come across...but lesbians??...being a woman...i just get it...isn't that strange, i understand the need for a guy to want to be a woman, but for a woman to want to be a man, why, this just makes no sense at all...the typical lesbian couple usually have a butch girl and a girly girly...my butch neighbour really looks like a guy...impressively so...only when i went over to introduce myself did i see that she is really only a girl who wants to be man... with almost non existent boobs and a very masculine hairstyle and chin... in a way that's sad but hey more power to them right...my new neighbours aren't all that friendly though...i didn't walk into their house and say...ok so i hear your two are lesbians...arching my eyebrows and asking..."so how's that working out for you???"... i made all the smalltalk, and after about a minute it was a done deal... they don't wanna be my friend... many of my previous neighbours are still very good friends of mine... neighbours are the greatest...not only for the odd thing to borrow...in my case it's usually ice...bugger the sugar or the eggs...my ice goes really fast...i like my g&t with lots of ice... anyway... so i think my new neighbours are probably people shy because of their sexual orientation.... which i get... but i'm a nice person...and would like to get to know them but as soon as it even looks like i want to go out of my front door... they run for cover... seriously what's up with that?? my previous neighbour...who's now a good friend by the way...also had this running~ away~thing going for a while but i was so persistent that she was forced to befriend me... i just love a challenge... and i turn out to be a excellent neighbour myself, i have a huge freezer in my garage, and my neighbours each have a shelf to stash their extra stuff in...ok that's just weird but it works for us ...i feed cats and dogs and don't look through their stuff when i house sit...so why they don't even want to give this neighbourly thing a chance, that's just weird... another thing that's quite weird... in the complex where i live all my neighbours, that's 4 units, all of them are woman, single woman...thankfully we have my butch neighbour cause in the face of danger we will have to call on her to take on the baddies... but it's not working out so well, i'll leave them alone from now, give the neighbourly wave as i pass and for the rest... welcome to the neighbourhood girls...!

red letter club

ladies, this one's for you...

Rabbit started a RED LETTER CLUB

now anyone who knows rabbit knows he is a absolute wizard with words...it's really fun, you have no idea how nice it is to get a snail~mail~genuinely~hand~written~on~ paper~kind~of~letter in your postbox!

so do yourselves a favour, pop over to rabbit's blog and email him your postal address, the royal mail service is quite remarkable, you won't wait long...

go on!!

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND Y'LL!!

in pursuit of happiness ...

it's been almost 3 years now since i've made my life changing move, packing my things and with a babe under each arm leaving my old life forever... can't believe it's been 3 years, somehow it feels too short... on the 4th of january i will be celebrating my new anniversary ... divorce day... i remember all important dates in my life, and with huge surprise i realized that for the first time in 18 years i forgot that the 18th of september was the day i met my ex, way back in 1988, and i've remembered that date ever since... unreal...so it's official...i've moved on!

another thing that i did after the divorce was final was to chuck away my wedding albums and to sell my wedding ring... to some this may be a bit extreme but i can't tell you how easily i let go of that... and the money came in handy...!!... ok i kept one picture of my wedding day, of me in my most stunning wedding dress, 19 years old, looking virginal and beautiful...not a fucking clue what utter shit decision i've made...

so this december i will be taking my id document and will be changing my surname back to my maiden name... big step but one that i want desperately... it's the last string i need to cut to be totally my own person again... the people close to me think that because of my kids i shouldn't bother... but it's something that i can't explain to anyone, i want my old identity back, the person i was before i even met him... and my maiden name is way more cool than my married name anyway...so there...

if i ever decide to tie the knot again...firstly the knot will have to be blessed by the bloody pope himself...i don't know... i won't easily get married again... he'll really have to be super special with loads of money and a huge.... nose.... or something... but then i think i'll keep my own surname... the one i got from my daddy... so back to the might-be-getting-married-again-one-day idea.... maybe i'll just live off him and use him for my personal pleasure....yeah i will have to do just that!

so i'll be practising my new signature this december, imagine that, i feel 16 all over again!

guten morgen!

have you noticed that you don't notice someones blog header that you visit regularly... well lemme tell you...people don't.... i've changed my header just for the heck of it for a bit... instead of "divorced with a sweet ass" i changed it to "sweet with a divorced ass" and nobody noticed...why i find this so fascinating i can't tell...my brain chemical balance requires such loony trivial info every now and again to set it's balance of something...i dunno... i just obey the voice in my head... mwhahahah... now i got your attention....!!!

i attended the most delicious dinner party on saturday night... at the house of my best friends' sister in law - they're german... properly so...speaking the german language whenever they have a chance... and of course to me and my friend... the only non-german or un-german...?.... people there...after 2 hours in the hot-tub with g&t's and red wine handed to us by the friendly german folk...we found their accent firstly hilariously funny and with the aid of the wine i'm sure, understood more than we ought to, and we had to try it... ich libbe tante pee... the delightful lady to my left at the dinner table found this piece of endearing love i sent her way quite amusing... i love germans...whey are so wunny.... they know how to party and to sing and to be jolly... my kind of people i tell you... and the food...don't get me started...after last year giving the octoberfest a skip...too many jagermeisters...oy...i was so inspired by them this weekend that i am sure to visit their fest again next year...weiss beer... pretzels.... and strapping blond guys parading their stuff in tight german play suits...good times!!!

auf wiedersehen!!!

Monday love!

hell...it's monday already...where did the weekend go??... anyway... i'm feeling the monday blues in a big scary way today so i thought i would share some love, maybe that'll make me feel all fuzzy inside...i've got high hopes ...

drum roll!!!

dear sweet Lee awarded me (among others)... yes i still can't wrap my head around that one, for the the blog most likely to inspire a pair of pajamas award ...rock on i just love that!! so here is what she said about me:

Sweet ass rsa:In my completely uneducated opinion I would say that sweet as cant decide between silky PJ’S and flannel ones with cow spots on them so I shudder to thing what Sweet ass inspired PJ may look like.Probably hot pants with writing on the but that says “ shut up ~ your looking aren’t you"

lemme just say this, it's absolutely shocking how close she is...spank my ass i'm blown away by such an accurate description!

so here i'm spreading some looooooooooove....

Angel, honey you are one in a million, i think there is no doubt in my mind how you pj's look... you don't wear any! i think i should buy you some flannels for xmas! in the odd case where you do wear some pj's i'm convinced it shall not be the conventional type what~so~eva!!

Glug what kind of sleepwear does a drug dealer use?....hmmm... me thinks you have a boxer thing going plastered with words such as "who's your daddy?!"

Sheebee definitely has a whole drawer full of flannels, definitely with a few odd surprising items thrown in~ i'm sure! the flannels come in handy with sheebee, she tends to step into sloppy wet puddle like packages around her house on a regular basis ... rock on girl, love your stuff!!

ok, people, spread some flannel love today....it's on me!!!

Friday!

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

The girl said, " NO!"

And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing,
camping, drank whole bottles of wine, always had a clean house, never
had to cook, did whatever the hell she wanted, never
argued, didn't get fat, travelled more, had many lovers, didn't save
money, and had all the hot water to herself. She went to the theatre,
never watched sports, never wore fricken lacy lingerie that went up her ass, had high self esteem, never cried or yelled, and felt and looked fabulous all the time.

THE END

secret code??

i've come across some strange blog talk... or net lingo or basically acronyms... i know a few but sometimes i read a comment or a blog somewhere and think...ok dude i have no fucking idea what you just said...seriously....please repeat in normal words???...while scratching my head, pulling my lip up and arching my eyebrows...

am i really the only one?? please help me out here...

the ones i know...

WTF...love this one...WHAT THE FUCK!!!

LOL...another favourite...laugh out loud

KWIM...know what i mean

OMG...oh my gosh/god

MF.... mother fucker.......just gotta say that again...mooooootheerrrrrrr fuckerrrrrrrr....

anyway...

those are the ones i can think of right now that i know....

but help me out of misery here...what on earth does the following acronyms stand for, if anything?? on the other hand maybe i'm just plain stupid, have to take that into account...hmmm...

BTW....??...be the wanker...what??? i don't get it!

IMAO...??? ...it's my ass only... :p

ROTFLMAO...i'm not even gonna try this one...wtf??

help is needed ....maybe i should call early bird...

changing places

I had another incident at my gym...sigh...unfortunately it wasn't on the treadmill...pity don't you think?...haha...anyway...they were upgrading the changing rooms and thought it best to swap the ladies and the gents for about a month...change is always good but this situation was just bound to stir things up...firstly i don't like changing at the gym...i usually change at work in my own private loo before i leave work...but that day i was late and decided to use the gym's facilities...big mistake...they had someone standing at the changing rooms 24/7 directing the genders...guys changing rooms just smells different ...why i still don't understand...but there it is boys...you smell funny...so there i was sitting down to change into my running gear...i don't like other woman looking at me while i undress...especially strange woman...that's just not on for me...but hey what to do...i could see the other woman were also nervous...nothing like the thought of a strange random guy walking into the changing rooms to make us nervous...i took my time...taking off my shoes at a leisurely pace hoping that the other babes would scoot and get the hell out so that i could change...eventually it was only me and i quickly pulled down my panties...i was looking over my shoulder just to double check when as sure as shit...in walks a guy...my panties around my ankles...oh fuck...i was actually paralyzed with shock...i did not expect this at all...my mouth hung open for about 2.5 seconds before i wailed..

EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE MEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the guy walked right up, put his hand on my shoulder and said...

i am a woman...

then turned around and left........

fuck

she was obviously a very butch type of woman....extremely so...this is a true story...i love my gym

weekend fun

got the photo's uploaded...*clapping hands wildly*...ok so the good news is that i uploaded some of my pics, the bad news is they are in the wrong order...tough luck i'm not uploading them again!! oy...

i love motor x...never in my life have i had so much fun as on saturday... i mean really, what more could a girl ask for ... hundreds of dirty bikers hanging around... the amount of testosterone alone was quite impressive, everybody was in a good mood ready to kick some ass.. i don't know what it was, maybe i snorted too much of the fumes, but i think i enjoyed the day more than my kids did... i couldn't seem to wipe the goofy grin off my face!!

here is my kay, having a go at the checkered flag, i still don't know how he organised that but anyway, he had a jol!

my friend took part in the race, it was her first time, and she did really well, although, like most she saw her own dirty ass when she fell... much fun...whoopee!!!

this piece of pleasure stopped his bike right in front of me, at this stage all the riders were really bushed, tired beyond all normal standards, the poor kiddies were literally carried over this obstacle, red in the face, begging for mercy...

some more action shots...

my kids now want to take up the sport...

but not if i beat them to it!!

random odd and useless...

i wanted to blog about my weekend today, but blogger has decided in it's infinite wisdom that it does not matter how many times i try to upload my photos...there will be no uploading of my pics today...so i leave you with this...will post tomorrow about my weekend...sigh

here are some random odd useless facts about me that you probably didn't want to know about but hey...shut up and read on ok...

i was in labour for 18 hours with my first born....natural birth...fuck i must have been crazy...they don't exaggerate in the movies...

i can move my ears...i shit you not...i think i have talent

i can burp really loud...for a girl this does not come naturally

i hate politics...i can't stand helen zille...

i've been married twice, to the same guy...i must be crazy in more ways than one

i had a huge crush on michael j fox when i was 12...it was insane

i love nelson mandela...he's not politics...admit it...he is a legend, and if you don't agree, don't say so, i don't wanna hear anything bad about madiba...deal?

i look exactly like my great-great-great-great grandmother...spooky beyond belief

i saw a burglar break into my house once...i was in the back seat of my car having sex with my boyfriend...what to do?

ek is 'n boere meisie...sheebee that maybe explains all the ...'s...have mercy

i love my running shoes...i dumped michael j fox for them

i have lots of credit card debt...i know, who doesn't, but i think i hold some kind of record

i love south africa dearly and would never be able to leave this country for good...proudly south african and all that

i've started 13 facts with “I”...this must stop...maybe i should have started each sentence with “believe it or not...”

party planning and friday humour!

firstly...the blog party...i will have to deliberate with my partner in crime angel so i will get back to you on the whole idea...you guys really keen??? we don't want to organise the whole thing and then only angel and i pitch...Lee you said you've tried this...gimme some feedback on what you think please...

ok then, its friday...............!!!

have yourself a vivaciously wicked weekend ya'll!

A FRIEND IN NEED IS

A FRIEND IN DEED

BUT THE BEST OF FRIENDS IS...

A FRIEND WITH WEED

boogie woogie!!!

i love dancing... i know i'm not particularly good...ok maybe i just plain suck at it...but hey...that little detail ain't stopping ms. ruby...that's my jive persona...ruby...love that name!!... i had a dance party in my living room the other night with my two boys... no mercy!!...my neighbours probably wanted to call the cops but i don't think police in the new south africa even bothers with calls like that anymore...imagine i was boogieing away and a cop knocked at the door...i would have thought he was a stripper and would have promptly dragged him inside...screaming "cuff me baby! cuff me n~o~w~~~..."

the poor kids couldn't keep up... their smiles said it all...they loved every minute...and that's the point isn't it...it doesn't matter how crap you are at some stuff...if you love it ~ don't stop...who cares what other's think of you anyway...

i reminded myself of travolta in saturday night fever...yeah baby...disco lights... it was so much fun! ... it took the kids a while to get into the groove but man it was a blast... i think dancing is like karaoke, some people just can't sing...they suck b~i~g time but they enjoy it so much...you just gotta love that blind confidence some have...rock on dudes...life's too short don't u think...!!

christmassy feeling...you gotta be kidding me

i did take off my word verification yesterday...but received some obvious spam...so sorry bridget... i activated it again...

all the shops have started getting all christmassy, and although i love this time of year…and all is well in sweetass~la~la~land…i couldn’t be more unhappy at work…i don’t know if it’s all the stress of year-end or if it’s the compressed frustration and crap i’ve had to take for the last 12 years from my boss; but i’m on the edge…push me and i’ll jump baby…yipee~kay~jay~mother~fuckers…

i’m starting to fantasize when my boss is talking to me…i just see her mouth flapping but i don’t hear a word…during this time i have rearranged her face and stolen all her jewelary… after her 10 minute speech i say…”what’s that?”...and sure as crap she’ll start again…after another 10 minute schpiel i’m also tempted to again say…”what’s that?” …but i don’t…i just want her out of my office as soon as possible…she actually is a great boss…for the rest of the year i quite enjoy her…but for now…i just want to slap her silly…she annoys me in so many different ways at the moment…it’s quite ridiculous…let me count the ways…i find it incredibly rude when i’m busy on the phone and she just starts talking to me as if what i’m doing is of no importance what so ever…really…just don’t do that…sure, you pay my bills at the end of the month…but watch it…i can only take so much…i do everything for her…she says she won’t be able to replace me ever…and i think she’s right…cause who would do all her crap for her and still smile at the end of the day…that’s me…fuck…she also has this annoying habit of assuming things…like she assumes i will do both her job and still go empty the post box…and what gets to me is that all my complaints are and irritations are actually irrelevant ignorable stuff…but if you are part of the furniture…and everybody treats you as such…it gets lame real easy…i’m so tired of this…i know i should get my sweet behind into gear and do the job hunting thing…argh…but that’s so much fun right…but come january i will be on the hunt like a pro…i can’t wait!...so if you need a office manager who can do your job for you, make sure you earn 5 times what i earn…organize your personal life, keep your husband happy (not that way perverts! ;-)…i’m your girl… sigh…

i can’t wait for christmas…and then it's my birthday….whoohoo…luckily i found angel and we have the same problem…we both have our birthday’s during the holidays…and although most people are sweet enough to phone me on my birthday…there’s no party…everybody is on some exotic holiday spot and don’t really want to talk about the birthday girl, they just want to tell someone about their kick ass holiday…good for them but not so peachy for me …so usually there is no celebration except my family spoiling my to death…at least i have that right…sigh…so even if angel and i just go and scare delicious mike some more…that’ll be a nice birthday treat for me…

alien word verification

Living Bridget left a comment yesterday...she complained about when you want to leave a blogger a comment...some ask for a word verification....stupid random letters that make no sense at all...really who thought that would be a good idea...personally bridget and i think it sucks...cause more often than not we type in the wrong letters...thank goodness...i thought i was alone... Bridget...yeah baby...i suffer from the same alien affliction...i really do try hard...but i think i may dyslexic or something...i usually have to try at least twice before i pass...it shouldn't be that difficult right...

other joyous news is that i've won something...how cool is that!...i've never won anything in my life before...a few weeks back they had some sort of a promotion at our local supermarket... you could win some really nice stuff and i always .... pick the wrong box...so needless to say i was totally stoked when i was notified that i've won something...not from the supermarket... something even better than that~

in june i wrote a letter to a running magazine, and guess what, it got published, not only did i win the letter of the month…it’s kind of sad though that I would enjoy being the monthly winner so much right…I know, I don’t know what’s up with that…so…I also get a prize... thank goodness i didn't have to pick a box for this one...isn’t that exciting…I won this really cool running watch…it’s a timex gents ironman 30 lap flix…ha!... i will probably never use any of the features but I’ll be wearing it everywhere I go...the only problem is that my letter got published in june...and is november already...and no watch to show off yet...i emailed a guy at the magazine ...haha...another mike...and he's been following it up for months now...and yesterday i got an email to say that they have confirmed my winning-status...pffttt...and my watch will be waiting at the post office soon...yeah...oh yeah...i love it...jealous? you should be, i won a watch... ;-)

i like mike

i met Angel on saturday for the first time...we had a girls' night out...and it was great fun to say the least...we chatted and smoked too much... she is really funny and probably the coolest mommy ever...she had a new tattoo done on friday...really cool...if you haven't checked out her blog...please do, you won't regret it...good to meet you baby!!!

glug we missed you... you will have to come with next time...you won't regret it, we promise!

we had the most delicious waiter...his name was mike...i think the poor guy was terrified of the pair of us...especially after i asked him if he was on the menu... let me just say that we didn't see much of mike after that.... teehee... why do men scare so easily??

this is a short post, i have plenty of work to do...sigh

delayed halloween

i know halloween was on the 31st...but i found this cartoon yesterday...funny stuff...!

hope you have a delectably delicious weekend y'all!!!

all things painfull...

i’m really pissed off today…fuming…kay does that to me sometimes…he’s known the whole freakin year that he has to give in book reports at the end of the year of all the books he’s read this year…which obviously are almost non-existent…and yesterday…

he says….so mom…i have to give in my book reports on of these days…
mommy me…yes…and…???
he says… i don’t know if i will be able to finish 10 books by friday…
mommy me… this friday…the friday that is 2 days away??????????????
he says...that’s the one!
mommy me…did i tell you to read your books?
he says...yes mom
mommy me... did i warn you that this was going to happen???????????
he says...yes mom
mommy me...don’t you yes mom me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fllllllllllllllllip!!!!!!!!!!

so guess what i’m reading at the moment? …the hardy boys…i shit you not…sigh…i know this is wrong…but if you knew how close he is to flunking this year…and now this…

anyway so yesterday i went to have my boobs squashed…mammogram...luckily they are very resilient buggers and they passed with flying colors…but let me tell you…a mammogram is not a joke…everyone was firstly very professional…like they are supposed to be i guess…they showed me to my cubicle to undress…and there was this little cape item that you are supposed to wear …i looked like florence nightingale…anyway…i walked to the examination room...it’s my first time and i was really nervous…and i knew that i look utterly ridiculous in the little florence suit of mine…and there i stand…everybody ignores me…i say…am i at the right place??...and the radiologist tells me…well if you feel like bat girl then you’re in the right place…mwhahahahahah…like i said i was really nervous so i laughed way too hard at that little joke…my personal radiologist…yes i had a lady looking after just me…at forking 665.30 ront i bloody well hope so…she takes my to my examination room…and there i have to lean over this very cold machine…and she takes dee-dee number one…and kind of roll her…yes i know...horrible...and then presses a button and zirrrrrrrrrrr…it squeezes and it keeps on squeezing…ouuuuuuuuuch…and snap…there’s my boob on a computer screen…voila…thank goodness i’m all clear…then we hop along to for the sonar…and there mr radiologist comes in…shakes my hand…was that really necessary?...somehow it just didn't feel like the thing to do...anyway…and proceeds to check my titties out further…i don’t like sonars…any variety...it's cold and sticky...and uncomfortable...and you're supposed to look like it doesn't bother you one bit....go for your mammograms girls...it's no fun but alas....necessary!