whazzup yo?!

goodness gracious me... get me some booze... this is not easy is it?

I'm not really back, i just miss so you damn much!!!

lemme just explain, i have no Internet access anymore, well barely, currently I'm stealing some from my sister... who incidentally offered me access whenever i need it, which is kind of cool... but... there's always a but right... half of the blogging experience is reading your bloggies man... so I'll can blog, no problem... but i can't read any of yours... so tell me, being the spastic techno retard that i am... can i follow your blogs via rss feed or something via my email? if so... ga... we might be in business!

ok so lemme know, seriously...

I'm still on leave, will start the new job on Monday, can't wait!
but on the other hand i could really get used to staying at home, fetching the kids from school... strangely comforting to be around them so much... anyhoodle...damn i have so much to tell you guys it's impossible to even remember one thing... dang... I've been dangerously social this past two weeks, had a lovely bloggirls get together on Saturday and the highlight of the two weeks...

i bought myself two absolutely dreamy dresses yesterday... at a Chinese shop nogal... i know, go figure... but I'm a girl after all and dresses, they make me happy :) the owner of the shop is so funny... all she can say in english is "yes... yes!"... so i used her for some positive reinforcement comments while trying on the dresses... "don't i look great??"... her reply...

yes... yes!!!

tell me my dear Chinese woman, would it not have been a good idea to learn some splanglish or some changlish before stowing away on the first best container heading for our shores?

yes... yes!!

i know... so how long have you been here? your shop has been around for at least two years, and you still don't bother to learn the language, what's up with that? you just wiping your ass on us or what?

yes... yes!!!

*sigh* i give up...

***

ja i know I'm pathetic, i was really determined with the "end" but am really
really
fucking really
missing this shit...

so... I'll ma see... lemme know about the rss thingymabob, maybe i should corner angel and let her enlighten me... oops that just sounded wrong right?

ok... until next time, whenever that might be :)

post number 324

i honestly can't believe i've written 324 posts... BUT the biggest surprise is that you actually read my posts... if i haven't met angel, glugs, sheebs, tamara, jackson, jane, philly and mzmozi in real life, i prolly would have thought you all were a figment of my overactive imagination... :)~


i've been stewing with this for a while and because i'm a very black and white kind of girl... i've done it... i've made my decision... about 3 minutes ago... i'm indefinitely going to stop blogging... *sniff*... it's just how it is right now, and it's all or nothing for me... things have changed so much in my life, it's all good and i have to move on for now... i don't have the time, i won't have access at work to blog so, the decision was actually quite painless and easy... i tried reading a few blogs every day but that's driving my crazy... i HAVE to read all the blogs on my blogroll every day, yes, i know, i'm a bit of an overkill :)


i won't be deleting my blog
maybe i'll take it up again, whenever...
i'll still read your blogs, that i promise
this is sad yes?
for me anyway...it's been an awesome ride, and i've met some really incredible people that in some strange way have changed my world ...


so auf wederzein all of you beautiful people...
miss me ok?
cause i sure as shit will miss doing this and doing you... erm i mean reading your blogs :)


peace out...

are you offended yet?

i have this teeny tiny pet peeve... and i know some of the blogs i read do exactly what i hate... so just tell me why, then maybe I'll get it...

some of you have your comments saved for the blog owner's approval... this is something i just

do

not

get

there is something to be said about being spontaneous dear fellow bloggers... don't be a scary cat... let the comments flow man... i promise you nobody is going to tell you that you are in fact the worst blogger in the world... sometimes there is a great rhythm going in the comments... and it doesn't even have anything to do with the blogger... it's like a mini chat room... and it's fun... so why are you spoiling my fun hey???? so strange... so tell me, why do you do it?

why?

why?

huh?

why??

and please those of you who do this... don't take offence ok... i'm just asking... like me, there are loads of great bloggers out there, that don't leave hateful, disgusting comments on a daily basis...

if you want a big girl panty just ask me to send you one...

it's...

erm...

quite liberating :)~

ps: it's not that i'm not reading any blogs, i am trying so damn hard to, you have absolutely no clue...but my connection speed is just enough to drive me batty... so apologies all around...

unemployment...

so you thought you got rid of me that easily?

ha...

think again :)

I'm at home, and blogging baby... not going anywhere!

very odd to be sitting here blogging... i should be at work... instead I'm sitting here with a cup of coffee and a cigarette... ah lovely... is this what all SAHM and daddyos do? i guess not... nobody to talk to... just the dishes and the unmade beds calling my name... I'm meeting a friend in an hour for a movie... yes a movie in the middle of the day...i can get used to this... for sure :)

so I'll be blogging at night from now on... no more internet freedom at work and I'll actually be working my sweet little ass into the ground... things change so fast yes? it does...

thanks for all your kind words, i dusted my shoes off when i left work on friday... and i didn't even shed a tear... i wasn't expecting to feel so numb about it all... guess a lot more baggage left than i expected...

have you noticed i haven't got anything to say today...

i don't...

clean slate? or maybe i just haven't woken up yet... my hair is standing in twelve different directions... and i'm lazy... hope to be back to my old self soon, this transition shit is not what it's cracked up to be...

anyhoodle... big girl panties signing off

(btw you guys are really digging my new big girl panty look... i could tell)

see ya

it's my last day!


it's my last day!


it's my last day?





scary shit if you ask me...


yet incredibly exciting...


i'm letting go of my blankie...


putting my big girl panties on...

and i can't wait :)

have a great weekend!!!!

i have a dream

i unfrickinfortunately don't dream much... i love to dream but for some bizarre unfair reason i think i sleep too deep or something... anyhoodle... now and again i dream real big... but unlike other normal people my mind stays in this dream-state but my eyes are open... and everything i dream, i see... then... after a few minutes... some part of my rational brain does kick in... so there i am part dreaming and part awake... indeed a very scary place to be... i usually have the same dream... a guy standing at the window, opening the curtain with a gloved hand... jikes... then i "wake up"... and i see him... i know I'm awake... and i know he's not real... he's all in my head... but damn at that moment... he's just standing there looking at me holding that damn curtain... awful... but... unless the gloved man has a ladder my window is thank goodness off limits to him now...

***

so... my brain concocted a new dream... sigh... i wake up last night half past 1... and there is a mouse on my bookcase... i shit you not... i see it... i put the light on... i see it again... i run to wake up my kids to come help catch the mouse... i get the broom... run back to the kids room and start yanking and pleading them to come help me... i rush back to my room....

***

--> jump on the bed...

***

-->broom above my head...

***

--->ready to whack the living daylights out of mr. mouse...

***

-->and it dawns on me...

***

...there is no mouse...

crayola love

i once had a discussion with a good friend of mine, she's got 3 kids... holy terrors... so we were talking about our kids (as mommies do) and suddenly she asked me " so which one of your kids is your favourite?" ...

dear Lord i almost chocked on my lemon cream biscuit! a favourite?! does she have a favourite kid? i don't! and i proceeded to defend this point of view until all the cookies were finished... but all jokes aside... kids are different... their personalities, their temperaments... all that stuff does make you probably get on better with one child ... but do i love one of my boys any less? no way!... i would gladly jump in front of a train to save any one of them... without a second thought... but in real life sure i do get along with one kid better than the other one, during some stages of their lives... at the moment for instance i just have the desire to slap Kay every single time i see him... why? cause he's 13... need i say more? but do i love him? oh yes... he's my baby and will always be, and in a few years time i will probably get along better with him than with Jay... but do I love Jay more because we get along better now? no! is he my favourite? hell no!

this second part will make sense at the end of the post... so bear with me :

i was doing a project for Kay the other day on Tsunami's... yes i do his projects, just zip it... i have my reasons... one being that i just love doing them... and secondly i just get better marks than him... i know i know...sigh... anyway... so i was doing some research on the web on everything to do with tsunamis and it made me think back to when in December 2004 that horrific tsunami hit Indonesia... worldwide 225000 people died because of that tsunami... shocking... there was a SA woman who, with her family was there on holiday... she did a interview when she came back home... and to this day i just cannot forget her story...

she was with her two kids, single digit kids... probably could swim by themselves, but with a tsunami obviously they didn't stand a chance of survival... so she was with them when the tsunami struck... and she grabbed both, as any mother should... she was fighting to keep herself and her two kids alive... paddling with nothing to hold on to... and then... after keeping the 3 of them above water... all her energy was exhausted... and she decided that she had to let one of the kids go if she wanted to save herself and one of the kids... so now... which one do you let go of?...

i cried for days about that story... not because of the decision she had to make, but the fact that she actually chose one above the other... that she thought that letting go of her child was even an option... to me that is just unimaginable... personally i would rather drown with my two kids, holding on for dear life rather than to let go of one of them...

thankfully the child she let go of survived too... but imagine the fear of that child... he must have held on for dear life... and his mother probably pried his hands off of her...

she told this story to the reporter... another shocker... i am still shocked by her decision to choose in the first place, and then secondly she told the world she did this... certainly this child will be told of this too... sigh... i don't know... it just broke my heart... cause it's just not right... how could she?

so that's how i see my crayola love... it's all or nothing...I'm not letting go of one of my little crayons... ever...

should i care?

thanks for all the compliments on my new look... i love it too, obviously... very minimalistic , simple yet bright...but being the Einstein that i am... i didn't copy my blogroll... before i changed over to the new look...so if you should be on my bloglist and you're not... please tell me... nothing personal ok? i know I'm missing a few and for the life of me i just can't remember who!!!

all of you have prolly heard enough about my new job / old job saga... well just one more small snippet i want to share with you... you ever get that "nafie" feeling at the precise second you resign from your job?... it's like changing gears... all of a sudden you're cruisin' for a bruisin'... "nafie" is that feeling that ummm how can i describe it to all you souties.. well basically you just don't give a flying fork anymore... yeah... that about sums it up... well I'm finishing up Friday... and the amount of work i have vs the amount of time i have left... off the scales... and here it is... check the worry in my eye! I've caught myself "filing" important documents accidentally into the wastebasket... i shit you not... my bin is looking fuller by the minute and although it's horrible that I'm doing this... again... check the worry in my eye... if my boss knew what i was up to she would fire my sweet ass on the spot... again... check the worry in my eye!... LOL... for all of you who had a hissy fit when i said I'm disposing of important docs in a random fashion... my boss just loves a paper trail... what i rate as not important she rates as a matter of life and death... so it's all relative after all... yes?...so... what else can i file today?

mission impossible

my dear ex boss is on a mission...

I've got 5 working days left and she's revved up like a maniac to get everything done this week...

what all the "everything" is i have no idea... but yes, I'll be working like a dog...

was expecting this...

so no long post today... will tell you tomorrow about Jay's 9th birthday yesterday...

yes my baby is living his last single digit year before he breaks into the double digits...

:)

freaky friday

BULLSHIT!

now go say sorry and have a good weekend :)~

good vibrations

so i haven't told you about this absolutely...


stunning
sexy
delicious
beautiful
hot
steaming
SINGLE


guy i met the other day... *goofy laugh*...


and what is so cosmically strange is that he works for the same company i will be starting at the 1st of November... he just has no idea what's coming his way does he?


*another goofy laugh*


so i guess spring has sprung then?

ellen

Ellen DeGeneres- she's gay... we all know that, no surprises there... but i think she's such a cool chick... regardless... does that make me sound, what's that fancy word again... darn i can't remember... phobic something... but you know what i mean... but hey maybe that's just me! she's kind of pretty in a boyish way and i totally heart her... OK now I'm sounding distinctly lesbo myself but face it~ she's 50 years old people and she looks like this... pretty damn nice i say...

anyway i was thinking about Ellen and her stunning bride and then of course i inevitably start wondering about other things... like them having sex right?... but hey, again, maybe that's just me...

omg i would disgrace myself totally if i was a lesbo... firstly touching another woman's boobs i would giggle myself into another blood group... seriously guys make it look so easy (just kidding we know you blokes just cannot help yourselves) and thank God for that too... so me as a lesbian?~ just cannot imagine it! so sorry to smash any girl 2 girl action fantasies there... but me... giggling a hundred miles a minute while going for the gspot~ nah... just not gonna happen :)

that's another thing though~ pleasing a guy is just to damn easy in comparison... but imagine getting a woman there... figuring out the wiring to get to that sweet spot... well again, hats off to you boys for doing such an awesome job with it... thank goodness y'all are more technically inclined...

so yeah i think I'll stick to men... but Ellen... you're still cool babe, rock on :)

spanners everywhere

this morning my boss dropped one huge mf bomb on my lap... she gave me a counter offer that i almost cannot refuse... a few thousand per month more than my new job!!! why is she doing this now? why am i worth more now all of a sudden... I'm almost pissed off about it... and then I'm flattered... sort of... and so on and so on... but i decided to not think about the money and still take the job i was offered at the other company... long term thinking sucks... i am such an adult eh? LOL... so there it is... i wasn't expecting this and i actually wish she never offered me more... I'm still due 2 weeks holiday before i leave, so my last working day will be next Friday... then i have another two weeks holiday before i start the new job... cool yes?

i thought so :)

age of loooooooove

hello all you beautiful people... i had a fab week off... i blew thousands of rands that i didn't have... but oh my goodness... it was a blast :)

so back to the rat race!!! i watched an indecent amount of tv this week... late at night... i don't know what it is with me... when i have leave i go to bed really really late... anyway was watching this stupid program "the age of love" it's like the bachelor... have you seen the show? argh!!!! about 12 woman try to win the bachelor... am i the only one that think that is just crazy???? honestly... then again it really fascinates me in a really sick kind of way ~ cause both- the hot bachelor and the dozen stupid woman ... they should just take what's coming their way... the guy shongs and prolly gets a lot of desperate booty... really i would never EVER do this show... i would get evicted on the first day after slapping the bachelor silly (after crushing his balls that is) and telling him his mama would not approve... because he would try to get some action from me and then telling me that I'm just so super special (please) and 10 minutes later he's licking the tonsils of the next poor girl... see just crazy!!... and what i find really funny is that the girls just cannot keep their mouths shut about the action they get! and 12 horny/desperate/jealous woman living together fighting for the affection of one bloke... omg... that's just looking for trouble... and then random chicken number 7 who thinks she is the super special gal confronts him about this shenanigans of the night before with random chicken number 2... and poor bachelor is speechless and shocked out of his jockstrap... and then he coos in her ear and random chick number 7 then again thinks she's the one... so if they actually think that they will find true love... well good luck to them! i think I'll pass...