long hair vs short hair

i'm the short haired girl... it seems to me that all the other girls have long hair.

i was one of those girls for most of my life, never had the guts to chop all the locks off, but one day i did it, and you know what, my arm didn't fall off, and no ugly moles suddenly appeared on my nose, i just cut it all off and it was great!!! it was like getting a new personality. nobody could believe that i cut it all off, i had really long, really curly thick hair... and then the hairdresser did a clipper cut on me for the next 6 months, i guess i was a bit rebellious... but you know how much money i saved on conditioner!!! i don't even use conditioner anymore, why that gives me such a thrill i still don't get...someone once asked me why did i cut off my hair, and i had to think about this because there was more to it than just "because"

... i needed to change, that was the reason i came up with, and it worked....

i changed....

i don't think the fact that i cut all my hair off made me get a divorce, that would be quite silly, but it did "something" for me. i have nothing against long hair, believe me, i sometimes still miss my long hair, but you know what i found out, guys like long hair... bummer... and yet that doesn't even faze me anymore, if a guy likes me for my hair first, you have to be kidding right??!!! helloo!!!! there is actually a person underneath the hair and the body and the big ass, someone who can be defined without a ponytail. i am quite baffled by the whole thing, i refuse to let my hair grow again, just to catch a man, you gotta be kidding me!!! then i will rather go without thanks.... people don't believe me when i say that i will rather be single for the rest of my life rather than have someone, and not be happy... i was so unhappy for such a fucking long time in my life...

i get a panic attack at the thought of being that long haired woman again... i will rather be a tomboy with short hair and be able to fall asleep ~alone~ with a smile on my face, than to be that terribly unhappy person ever again. if it wasn't for the sex i would actually make a great lesbian, but arrrghhhh no thanks, a real flesh and blood dick is what i prefer hehe!

Internet dating

what happened to the days when you met your future bloke in the local supermarket or at a friends party? i'm at that age, all my friends are married, good for them, i'm not so lucky, i'm divorced, happily i might add, but still divorced. now the problem is that it seems that all the available guys i've met thus far are not hooked up for a reason... they are either not relationship material or they are just plain icky, you know the kind where i would rather gladly (chomp chomp) opt for a mouth full of cut glass before i would kiss that guy, urghhhh, thanks but no thanks honey!

so what is a girl to do??? internet dating they say.... oh dear, things certainly have changed.... so i tried it, you can't knock something until you've tried it right? now people, hear me, on the web is all, or most at least of the craziest weirdo's mankind could scrape together in one tight-knit, horny community, cause really that's all it is, everybody is horny and looking for some humping... shag....shag... that i realised after about 1 day, shocking, i must be more conservative than i ever imagined! the one proposed black leather outfits and whips, yeah right insane person, i would love to meet you??!!!! the other guy told me, ok toots we all know why we are on this site, i want to shag your sweet ass, i just hope you have no pubes, cause mr crazy does not like pubes, good heavens, now meeting a guy like that would just be like....dumb, like meeting most of the guys i "met" online, they are not your average guy at all, really, trust me, don't go there... unless.... you actually meet someone nice.

my stubborn nature could not believe that there was not one normal guy that could actually be a sane, nice guy.... and lo and behold i actually found him, or did i? i chose him as a favourite and we started chatting online, but i was soooo scared that he was a serial rapist just waiting to grab my sweet ass... you know?? so i kept at it, chatting away and after about two months of chatting, i actually agreed to meet mr online, spoke to him on the phone, check, saw his photo, check, told a friend where i would be, check, but i was as nervous as hell.... thank goodness the date went ok, no awkwardness, no earth shattering fireworks though, but i have to admit that fireworks, although it's very sweet and great, is highly overrated and not on the top of my list of priorities anymore... been there got a drawer full of t shirts... so we'll see, he's ok, but i must admit full of sh&t like most men, oh dear i think i will opt to stay single for a while longer, who knows one day my knight in shining armour may still knock on my front door... i'm waiting in anticipation!